Hobie's campaign started in the 1996 July 4th Horton Bay
Parade.
Horton Bay is one of the most picturesque villages in Northern
Michigan.
Ernest Hemingway spent all of his youthful summers nearby, mentioned
Horton
Bay and its high false-face front general store in his early stories, and
married his first wife Hadley in a white clapboard Methodist church in
the village. Although the year-round residents are few, many identify
with
their zest for life and all of its absurdities and pleasures. Horton
Bay
has for years declared itself to be the 51st state, in the past has
held
winter games featuring a frozen fish toss, and is home to the best 4th
of July "peoples parade."
The 1996 parade theme was elections. Although we believe the
best
entries are hatched the night before with the help of adult
beverages,
given such a depressing topic we were stumped to come up with an entry.
But when our son said our dog should be in the parade, a vision
of an endless
stream of politicians sitting on the backs of convertibles
throwing candy
to the crowd appeared. It took far more time to put this on the web
than
it did to prepare our parade entry.
The first parade entry was "Buford" driving his front loader with
signs saying he wanted
to be "Elected King --because we need the money."
We led off with cousin Ed majestically carrying a sign
that said Hobie was the "Best Candidate" since he
CAN'T GIVE BORING SPEECHES, CAN'T RAISE TAXES,
AND CAN'T SIGN NEW LAWS
Others carried signs saying:
HOBIE IS HONEST, LOYAL & BRAVE
HOBIE IS NOT CONCERNED ABOUT RE-ELECTION SINCE
HE'S 6 YEARS OLD ALREADY
YOU DON'T NEED BIG BUCKS TO GET TO HOBIE,
JUST A DOG BISCUIT
HOBIE LIVES OUTSIDE THE
HORTON BAY BELTWAY
AND HOBIE DOESN'T FOLLOW POLLS -- HE PEES
ON THEM.
Our handsome clipped English Sheepdog Hobie rode on the back of
Carmel California
Roger's convertible with signs saying:
A dog could run the
country
better than 98% of the politicians
and the other 2% are dead
& VOTE FOR A
REAL DOG.
A brother who teaches history and political science at an
unnamed university
said "negative campaigning" was needed to complete the picture
so he and others followed carrying signs saying:
THE N.Y.TIMES SAYS HOBIE IS A CANINE
THE NATIONAL ENQUIRER SAYS HOBIE IS
A SOB
THE STAR SAYS HOBIE RUNS AROUND
INSIDE EDITION REPORTS HOBIE IS MARRIED TO
A BITCH
AND
HARD COPY SAYS HOBIE USES 4 LETTER WORDS:
"BARKE" (Thanks D. Quale)
Our campaign parade entry was a rousing success -- except for the
kids who were surprised that we threw out dog biscuits rather than candy.
Our biggest problem now is when Hobie rides in a convertible he is
disappointed
1,000's of people are not chanting "Run Hobie Run."
Humorous fun -- but also hitting a nerve of the good people in the
heartland of America.
In the last weeks of the 1996 presidential campaign the political
pundits discovered the electorate's disenchantment with the process and
the candidates. As usual the people
were ahead of the media and politicians -- if they had just left
the beltway
for this 4th of July parade they might have had a better feel for
the mood of the country well before the election.
Don't Miss Hobie's page of PAST POLITICAL
WISDOM, a CALL TO ACTION written
6 years ago,
& Hobie's NO
DOG-DOO PARTY PLATFORM
or Return to The Elect
Hobie Web Page
